More Tips

Before we got so rudely interrupted by Tropical Storm Nicole, we had been looking at ways that we can be more effective in ministering to kids in the classrooms. We last look at Defining A system. Today we turn our attention to Tailoring that System, here we go:

TAILOR YOUR SYSTEM

Although rules need to remain consistent, it's also important to factor personalities into the equation. Children often hear rules through the grid of their God-given personalities.

For a strong-willed child who may evolve into a discipline problem without guidance, preface a desired behavior in words that empower; for example, "You can be in charge of cleaning up the block center."

Otherwise calm, peace-loving children may have problems making transitions between experiences. They respond best when you provide warnings and time to respond. For example, "In five minutes, we'll move on to our centers."

Fun-loving children may be busy talking with their friends and forget the rules. They usually respond well to warm, loving words about something enjoyable. You might say, "I wonder if we can get our centers all cleaned up by the time I count to 10? Then we'll have time to play a game."

Perfectionists may have trouble because they get stuck emotionally or can't do something just right. They usually respond well to encouragement. You could say, "I know you're upset that those colors don't match, but it's a very detailed drawing. I'm sure your mom will want to hang it up when you get home."

Hope these help. Tomorrow we will look at refining our skills.

Source: Group

Hello Nicole

One of the things we must get used to as residents of this great state of Florida is the fact that we get uninvited visitors all the time in the guise of hurricanes, tropical depressions, and tropical storms. Today is one of those days. We are getting ready to welcome Tropical Storm Nicole. As a result of Nicole stopping by we find ourselves with the need of canceling our Wednesday night service. We don't want to put any of our brothers or sisters in danger by having to drive through flooded streets. So stay home, stay dry, and have church at home like they used to do 2000 years ago. We will see you this weekend.

More Teacher's Tips

DEFINE YOUR SYSTEM

Don't wait until problems arise to create a discipline plan. Teacher training needs to include details about how to handle common behavioral problems-and when to seek help for the "bigger" issues as well. Try these steps.

Set ground rules. I've found that three simple rules work well for children of all ages: 1. When you want to talk, raise your hand and wait to be called on. 2. When someone else is talking, be quiet. 3. Keep your hands and feet to yourself unless you have permission. If you teach young children, you may need to repeat these three guidelines every week.

Establish a clear discipline process. I recommend this simple three-step approach. The first time children violate a rule, walk to them and quietly tell them the rule. In other words, assume they have rule amnesia, which is prevalent in childhood. State the desired behavior first; for example, "We use our hands to love and help, not hit." For a second violation, walk to children and ask them what the rule is in your room. For a third violation, have an immediate consequence related to the misbehavior.

Develop logical consequences. The purpose of a consequence is to retrain the brain and transform the heart. Training through discipline requires that the deed and consequence be logically related and that it occurs right away. The consequence helps children see that their choices determined what happened. This brings accountability into the picture.

This one is EXTREMELY important. Consequences must maintain children's dignity. Respond only to the current misbehavior and don't bring up a long list of past offenses. Instead of saying, "You always…" or "You never…," simply say, "Because you've chosen to do this behavior, this is the consequence."

For example, if children talk rudely and inappropriately, they must find a nice way to say the same thing. If children hurt someone else, they must do something kind for him or her. Connected, immediate consequences can lead to significant changes in children's behavior.

I have noticed that these tips also help in parenting. Tomorrow we'll look at tayloring the system.

Source: Group, Jody Capehart

Teacher's Tips

You love God and children. You feel called to teach and be enthusiastic about the year ahead. But now you find yourself faced with disruptive children. You don't want to give up; you're just frustrated beyond belief.

This probably sounds familiar. Most children's ministry teachers or volunteers have the passion and the right attitude, but relatively few are equipped for when the "little angels" behave less than angelically. Unfortunately, that leaves many formerly upbeat teachers ready to throw in the towel.

How can you prevent discipline problems from diminishing your effectiveness and joy? Here's a bounty of practical pointers:

RELY ON GOD

Ground your discipline strategy in God's Word. Hebrews 12:11 says, "No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening-it's painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way." Children usually don't view discipline as training in right living, though. They often interpret strictness as meanness. Although the former is okay, the latter is never appropriate.

A discipline policy is really a discipleship process that allows us to demonstrate Jesus' love. Although we may not like everything children do each moment, we always love them. They need to hear and feel that from us often.

Adults' character and conduct are very contagious to children, who learn more from how we act than what we say. So it's important to respond in a Christian manner rather than react in the flesh. When we adults rely on God to model respect, manners, concern for others, and a gentle spirit, we teach volumes.

Discipline is far more effective when you move slowly and quietly, praying for God's guidance. Prayer is the Christian version of "counting to 10." It slows down our human reactions, puts things in proper perspective, and gives the Holy Spirit opportunity to work. In our weakness, God can use us to glorify him.

Tomorrow we'll look at more pointers.

Source: Group, Jody Capehart

This Weekend at CCk

If you want to see what God can do even in seemingly insurmountable circumstances...
If you want to hear a miraculous story of how God calls the most unlikely people to do his work...

If you want to be inspired to see how God might use your life to impact the world...
Then, join us this weekend as we welcome Pastor Raul Ries from Calvary Chapel Golden Springs to tell his story at all of our regularly scheduled weekend services.

Growing up with an alcoholic father who abused him and his mother caused rage to fester inside Raul. He lashed out by joining gangs and committing crimes in the Los Angeles area. The violence and pain escalated - until one day a judge told him it was either prison or the military. Raul chose Vietnam and came back angrier than ever. Eventually Raul's rage reached its boiling point, and just as he was about to do the unthinkable, God intervened. He has an amazing story, you don't want to miss it! So come and join us and don't forget to bring a friend.

Don't Quit

September 8, 1990. The Texas Rangers were hosting the Kansas City Royals at Arlington Stadium. 34,412 fans were watching these two teams battle.

During the second inning, Bo Jackson, a fierce hitter for the Royals smashed Nolan Ryan’s first pitch to him right back at the mound. And it wasn’t pretty. Ryan misplayed the baseball and the line drive hit him right in the mouth. Ryan’s lip was split wide open and there was blood everywhere. Amazingly, he refused to leave the mound. With a shirt stained with blood, and a busted and swollen lip, he pitched to the 7th inning. The Rangers went on to win the game 2 – 1.

Crazy? Yes. Tough, hard-nosed baseball? You bet. Nolan’s picture from that day is hung everywhere as a reminder to keep “the fight” in you. To “get up” and keep doing battle.

The writer of Proverbs understood this. Proverbs 24:16 says, “For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again.” Wow. Can you imagine getting knocked down seven times and still getting back up? It sounds like the fight between Rocky Balboa and the Russian in Rocky IV! The Apostle Paul quoted Jesus when he felt his knees buckle from the pressures and pain in his life. II Corinthians 12:9, “My GRACE is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” Catch this, Paul went on to say that he was glad when he felt weak, because that is when he knew just how strong the power of Christ is. That’s what kept him in the game.

When life delivers those devastating blows, resolve to get up to stay in the fight. How? With God’s Grace, and in His Strength.

Source: AACC

911

Once a kids pastor always a kids pastor, and living on that premise finds me always looking for tools to either help kids or help the parents who are raising them. While on that search I found this article and I thought it was good, so I'll share it with you.

Every school kid in America knows to call 911 in a crisis. Not if everything’s well or fine and the day is normal. But in an emergency…when there is tragedy or danger… that’s when you dial 911.

When you are in trouble or need help I’ve got another number for you. Remember…Psalm 91:1… “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty.”(TAB)

Is your heart heavy? Discouraged? Sick of the way you are living? Have you been hurt? Are you tempted beyond what you feel you can handle? Then go to Psalm 91:1. Dial it in. God knows and He’s there for you.

But the key is to dwell in the “secret place” of the Most High. That’s your responsibility. To spend time with the Father. Soak in His presence. And then when trials and hard times come…and they will come…you can remain stable and fixed. You can “be still” and “know that He is God”…and that this crisis – this journey – this season – this too shall pass. Don’t fear. Be secure. Where? Under the shadow of the Almighty.

Is all well with your soul? Then God has called you to care. Millions of people are searching right now for God. They need and want His touch. Let God use your hands to dial the number for them. 911. He will answer. Bear their burden with them. Lead them to the secret place. The place of safety and stability. A place where they can, and will, learn to Hunger and Thirst…for His protection…for His presence…

Source: AACC.

Amazing Weekend

This past weekend I had the opportunity and the privilege of witnessing God moving in the lives of people. We had Pastor Bob Coy the senior pastor of Calvary Chapel Fort Lauderdale speaking at our West Campus. He kicked off our new series called Story. As we expected we had a great turnout for the three weekend services. There were close to 3000 people that came out to hear him speak and they were not disappointed. Pastor Bob is a great communicator, not only that, but he is also totally committed to God and to spreading His Word. Bob shared his testimony and what God has done and is doing in his life. He did it in a down to earth manner and simply had us all laughing at times and also crying at other times. Overall it was great to see how the Lord used him to bring people to a saving relationship, as several people responded to the invitation to accept Jesus as their Lord and Savior. I am also thankful and at the same time humbled by the commitment of all the volunteers that gave of their time and their efforts to make this event happen. Without their help it would have been impossible to minister to so many people. From the set up and break down crew, to the Kidz Ministry volunteers, to the security people, greeters, ushers, everyone served with a smile on their face and a willing heart to help. I am honored to be the campus pastor serving alongside this great bunch of Jesus crazed people, I thank you all from the bottom of my heart and I look forward to more events like this that we can continue to bring people to light through the Gospel of Jesus Christ. If you want to read more about Pastor Bob's story go here.

More on Becoming a Better Parent

Here are so more tips on becoming a better parent.

Tenderness

Tenderness is to love unconditionally, and it is having a soft hand of discipline even when children irritate, argue, or disappoint. It is the same message Jesus shouts to us, in any condition of sin or grace, we are worth everything to Him!
Also learn the way your child gives and receives love and overdose him or her with that love! According to Christian child psychologist Fran Stott, “Every child needs at least one person who’s crazy about him.”

Teaching

Whether present or absent, a parent is always teaching something to his or her child. Your child learned something from you today, guaranteed. Don’t miss a moment to teach your child important life lessons. And if one parent is absent, assure the child that he or she deserves two parents, even though one might not be around.

Tenacity

Today kids need structure and stability more than ever, for their lives are more erratic, confusing, and rapidly changing than for any generation in history! Parents, be a reference point, an anchor that holds firmly against powerful countercurrents.
The hardest part of parenting is staying persistent. Your investment now is what your child has to “bank” on as he or she grows into a compassionate, competent adult. The truth is children grow up way too soon. Never quit
being the parent your child needs.


Tomorrow

The most beautiful part of God’s love for us is in what Scripture calls the “blessed hope”, an eternity with Him in heaven. Parents, fill your children’s hearts with hope. Believe in them. Dream with them. Look expectantly to the future! Be big on praise, forgiveness, and grace, and be small on criticism. There is no better inheritance, no amount of money or privilege or worldly power that can compare to a legacy of hope in a godly future.

Well there they are, I hope and pray that they can be helpful tools in our journey as parents. I know they have helped in my relationship with my kids.

Source: AACC, Fran Stott

Becoming a Better Parent

Our goal as Christians should be to become the man or woman that God wants us to be, and for some of us that means being the best parent that we can be. Whether a single parent or a family unit the following steps can help us in achieving just that.

The following guidelines are called the “super Ts” and are the foundation of any good parenting, whether the parent is single or not. They are a basic guide for all parents on how to build relationship and bring up a happy and healthy child. (It should be apparent that for many of these tasks, the single parent will need the help of other adults. No one person can accomplish all these alone.)

Time

Kids spell love T-I-M-E. There is no substitute for every hour, minute, and second of quality time fathers and mothers spend with their children. Kids need heavy doses of you every day if possible.


Touch

A hug and kiss, holding hands, brushing hair, wrestling, high fives, even cuddling on the couch, most child experts agree kids need at least eleven touches a day.

Talk

Find the interests you and your child share, and talk! Or ask your child about his or her day. Remember, communication is more nonverbal than verbal, so be careful of all the different ways you “speak” to your child.


Truth

Deuteronomy 6:6–7 says, “These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up” (NIV). Parents’ morals fill the little hands and hearts of their children. Therefore, ground your child in the truth of God’s Word.

I'll look at more of these tomorrow.

Source: AACC.

Spiritual Intimacy Part IV

So far we have looked at several action steps to improve our Spiritual Intimacy, they were:Talk, Listen, Sharing,Praying,Doing Bible Study and Spiritual Learning. Today I want to look at the last two action steps, they are:

Worship and Serve Together.

Worship is a vital part of spiritual intimacy and finding a church where worship brings you directly into the presence of God may be a key goal. Instead of the husband going to a men’s retreat, and the wife to a women’s group, attend religious activities together.

Make sure you are both actively involved together in your church ministry. This not only includes sitting together during services but also volunteering together and having your marital relationship be a vital part of your identity in the church.

According to Gary Chapman, "Because service to God is so central in the Christian life, it also plays an important role in developing spiritual intimacy within marriage. Spiritual intimacy greatly increases when a husband and wife serve together."

Well, there they are, I pray and hope that it may help some of you like it has helped me.

Source: AACC, Gary Chapman.

Spiritual Intimacy Part 3

Continuing our journey to find and apply actions steps that will help us in our spiritual intimacy, the next action step we look at is,Bible study and spiritual learning.

Many couples find studying the Bible together a comfortable way to build spiritual intimacy. The downside is that studying together often takes more time than praying together, and it can feel impersonal if the study is more technical than reflective. Few couples will feel very close studying the ontological argument for God’s existence, for example. The key to building spiritual intimacy through religious spiritual study is bringing in one’s own personal reflection. Ask, how does this particular Scripture convict, encourage, or challenge us? Sharing and listening to each other’s reflections are key components of building spiritual closeness through study.

We got one more area to look at I'll post soon.

Source: AACC

More on Spiritual Intimacy

Continuing on the actions steps to find spiritual intimacy with your spouse, last post I wrote about Talk, Listen, and Share, in this post we will look at:

Pray, Pray, and Pray Some More.

Paul Tournier, in his book To Understand Each Other, writes:
"Happy are the couples who do recognize and understand that their happiness is a gift of God, who can kneel together to express their thanks not only for the love which he has put in their hearts, the children he has given them or all of life’s joys, but also for the progress in their marriage which he brings about through the hard school of mutual understanding".

It is said that few spiritual endeavors have as great a potential for building spiritual intimacy as praying together. If praying together is not your style, or if makes you uncomfortable, you and your spouse can pray separately for each other daily, then talk about what you prayed. It is likely that over time, simply talking about prayer will help you be able to pray together comfortably.

Try some or all of the following tips they may help minimize any discomfort either of you feel about praying together:

Try praying together when the two of you are already in a spiritual mindset, such as after a church service or before small group meetings.

Try praying together when there is less pressure, such as while riding in a car or listening to music or taking a walk or while in a large crowd.

Try reading the Psalms together. Read a passage, and then pray about the content of the verses. Instead of making up prayers on the spot, find a book of prayers and pray them together.

Solicit prayer requests from others. Make a list and pray for the specific issues on that list.

Pray together silently.

Source: AACC,Paul Tournier.

Spiritual Intimacy

In today's society where the divorce rate is so high, we must always be on the lookout for ways that will help us make our marriages stronger. One of the ways I think that is essential for the health of a marriage is that of spiritual intimacy. There are many ways couples can work to build spiritual intimacy. The following action steps give several of these ways.

Talk, Listen, and Share
Spiritual intimacy cannot occur in a relationship unless there is meaningful communication about spiritual matters. Set aside some time each week even if it is just fifteen minutes to talk about spiritual growth and the things of God.
Spouses need to be able to talk about:
What God is doing and not doing in their lives.
What they have learned about God recently.
Ways that God is speaking to or leading them.
Their doubts or faith problems, including any sense of disconnection with God.
Spiritual areas in which they need improvement.

Keys for listening include:
Be attentive to what your spouse is saying.
Do not condemn or judge your spouse’s struggles or mistakes.
Be supportive and reassuring, emphasizing God’s mercy and grace.
If you feel compelled to share a contrasting point of view, share it as your interpretation, not God’s. And don’t make it seem that your spouse has a warped understanding.

Preaching at your spouse, including pointing out his or her sins or beliefs that seem wrong to you, is not a good way to build spiritual intimacy.

So talking, listening, and sharing is a good place to start. More action steps to come.

Source: AACC

Perseverance

Do you know who invented the light bulb? Thomas Edison. Do you know what else he discovered? Perseverance. He simply refused to give up. At least 6 other men had tried, failed, and given up on the light bulb. But Edison learned the importance of hard work, determination and a “can do” attitude, 6000 that’s how many different plants fibers he tried in the hopes of finding one that would work for the filament of the light bulb. He finally found that a carbonized cotton thread glowed a soft orange when voltage was applied to it. After this, it still took Edison over 2,000 attempts to light his bulb successfully. When asked what kept him going after so many failures, he replied, “Those weren’t failures. I discovered 2,000 ways that didn’t work.” Each try brought him closer to his dream.

The Apostle Paul certainly understood challenges and discouragement. In 2 Corinthians Chapter 11 he relates some of what he went through in his travels, sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ. “Five times I received 39 lashes…Three times I was beaten with rods… Stoned once… Shipwrecked three times… Spent a night and a day clinging to life in the sea” And the list goes on. And yet this same Paul wrote in Galatians 6:9, “Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we shall reap if we do not grow weary.”

Are you discouraged? Down? Filled with confusion? Or maybe doubt? Do you wonder if God is listening? He is. And even though you can’t see or feel it yet… He is at work in your life. Never, ever give up on God. Keep moving forward. Do not lose heart. Keep looking up. Your miracle is, quite possibly, just a prayer away.

Source: AACC

The Law of the Garbage Truck !

A friend of mine sent me this and I think is sooo true. I hope the rest of your day is "garbage free."

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car just by inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy I mean he was really friendly.

So I asked, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!"

This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, "The Law of The Garbage Truck."

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run all around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointments. As the garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day.

Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, resentments, anger, and frustration; so........... Love the people who treat you right, Pray for the ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it, and ninety percent how you take it.

Have a blessed, garbage-free day!

From Negative To Positive

Peer pressure. Just say those two words, and they can strike fear in your heart! But add the word "positive" to this alliterative statement and you have a wonderful tool to help kids learn to make the best choices. Positive peer pressure. These three words pack a powerful punch, just the kind of positive punch we want in children's lives to help them make good decisions when we're not around. It's important to understand the nature of positive peer pressure and take action to foster its benefits. Read More Here.

Are We Protecting Our Kids

As a parent raising kids in this date and age I want to make sure that my kids (they are not kids anymore) feel safe. In my constant search for tools to achieve that goal, I came across this information, I pray it helps you. We as parents must ask ourselves some questions and be honest in our answers. For example, how is it going with our kids? Do they feel safe with us? More importantly, do they feel protected?

* From the “bully” down the street…
* From the fear of failure…
* From peer pressure…
* From the daily evil in their lives…

In today’s world we want to protect our kids from ALL of the pain life often delivers. But we can’t. However, we, as moms and dads, can be a place they can run to. We can be their refuge. Our kids can feel safe. They can feel protected. And understand this spiritual phenomenon, we are an EXAMPLE to them of the protection found in their Heavenly Father. The pattern we set with them as they grow up, directly affects how they will relate to God throughout their whole lives. The degree of intimacy that we establish with our kids now, directly affects the level of intimacy they will have with their Heavenly Father for years and years to come.

I am convinced this is what Solomon meant in Proverbs 22:6… “Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it”. It is not so much about discipline as it is about relationship. The relationship they have with us will be mirrored in the relationship they have with God. The quality of our relationship, I believe, also directly impacts the effectiveness of our discipline strategy. Show me a home where all you do is discipline, and I will show you a home that has lost relationship.

This week as we interact with our kids lets commit to pray over them. Pray with them. Listen to them. Laugh with them. Spend time with them. Show them we care. Let them know that they are important. That they matter. And as we do this, they will hunger and thirst for relationship, with us, and more importantly, with God…

Source:AACC.